Dave and Jason share their secrets on how to obtain the best Dad bod available. For Dave it requires a tight 10 hours of sleep every night, and for Jason the secret really is found at McDonalds. Dave’s pearl of wisdom for this one: “Eat the bun!”

  Welcome, millions, perhaps billions of faithful podcast listeners. We are your host, Jason Kimber and Dave Simmons. We'll bring you along with us as we share life stories from our experiences living in small towns, or in Jason's case, an unincorporated community. That's true, along with genius suggestions for solving the world's problems and a whole lot of laughs.

This is the Small Towns Podcast. Well, good news. Jason. I don't know if you saw the information on the Worldwide web this week. Uh, no. What's going on? Well, I read that 75% of all the people polled prefer a dad bod over any other type of bod. I. Which is, I mean, I've been saying that for years, about at least 10 years.

So we're in good shape. Well, I'm not in good shape. No, you are. I'm not a dad. BOD is good shape. I am in, yeah, I'm in good shape as it relates to that because I have, I have actually been supporting a dad bod. I'm in my mid forties and I've actually been supporting a dad bod. Since my early teens. So you're a pioneer.

Yeah. You are a pioneer in the world of dad bods. I am an early adopter, my friend. Yeah. At 15, you're like, you know what, this dad bod looks okay. I'm crushing it with a dad bod. Yeah. And, and why anybody would go to the gym and ruin that I don't know is beyond me. Makes no sense. No, it makes no sense. I've already achieved yes.

What every 75% of the people out there like this. So let's keep it the way it is and it's not like it takes zero effort, I mean, You think I just wake up looking like this? Well, probably. Probably. I do. It's take, it's taken years of fully leaded Coca-Colas. Absolutely. Couple of Big Macs here and there.

Yeah. You chase a cheeseburger with a chicken sandwich? Oh yes I do. And then is when you maybe go for the cookie. And because of that, Dave, for some of our local listeners, if you go to the South Logan McDonald's here in town that my friend is Why my picture? My face is on the wall. The window. I saw the window.

Thank you. Yes. It's for the world to see my mugshot. Well, mugshots probably not the correct terminology, but my face is there. I saw it. And you look great, by the way. Thank you. I feel great. Yeah, and that's my dad bought face. Well, you mean the football pose where you kinda get your lit and you got a couple chins going on there?

All I know is when Covid hit and they didn't let people come in there, they were missing you in particular apparently. Which is why your pitcher is on the window saying, we miss you, we, and we can't wait to have you back in the lobby. It didn't stop me. I mean, the drive through is saved from a bacon, literally.

And, um, I appreciate it. The, uh, the sentiment went a long way and I wouldn't expect anything less. I mean, for crying loud, I get a Christmas present from, uh, bill and his team at, uh, south McDonald's every year. That's a crazy thing to me. If you're getting a Christmas present, is it a present or like a card?

'cause there's a difference. Well, there's a difference, but it's a card with a nice loaf of bread. Oh my goodness. From McDonald's. Yeah. It's a present. That means you're going to McDonald's enough. Yes. Obviously with the dad bods that we have. I mean, we're not shying away from drive-throughs. Well, yeah. I mean this dad bod just doesn't happen.

No, you gotta work on it. You gotta work on it. You gotta work. And it's just as hard to do it that way as it is to go and pump iron it. Yes, it is. It's so, so all those guys out there just eat the bun. Just go ahead and eat that bun. You know, you don't have to take the meat off the bun. And then, oh, I can't have the bun.

Eat the bun, eat the bun. Don't, don't say, Hey, hey. Um, could you ask in the back in the kitchen, could you just bring out a head of lettuce because instead of the bun, any chance we could just wrap this piece of meat in a big piece of lettuce? No weirdos. You know what? Weirdos. Weirdos just eat. The bun, eat the bun.

And I want that to be on a t-shirt. Merch. Just go ahead and eat the bun. Yeah, we're we gotta figure out some merch. Eat the bun. That's what the kids are saying anyways. Dad, you got some merch? I'm like, I don't think we've got merch. I just like the word merch. I do too. There's a great, I mean, I don't wanna get too far off from the weeds on this, although one of my favorite places to be, but there was a great commercial little while ago and it was just, it actually, it was like a, I think boyfriend girlfriend situation and the girlfriend was like, Hey sweetheart, why does everybody at work call me Muffin top?

And he is like, oh sweetheart, it's because that's the best part of the muffin. Oh yeah. Yeah. And that's kind of my dad, Bob Lemonade outta lemons. Exactly. I got one of those stories. Beautiful. That's for another day. Yes. Got me in trouble actually. But you know, as I've been thinking about Dad bods Uhhuh and how great they are, one thing that has really helped me with my dad, Bob, is a dad, Bob.

Dad. Bob is a, uh, a nice, I gotta get a tight 10 hours of sleep every night. 10. Well, I don't get 10. Okay. I'd like a good tight 10. I'd do better with 10 as well. Me too. I mean, if I get up and I've had six, I'm ornery. I'm not the same peppy guy you see today. If I don't get a tight 10 until it gets to be about, I don't know, 11 or 11 or noon, yeah, then I'll start to come outta my shell, but I'm dragging around if I don't get a tight 10.

I'm the same way, Dave, actually with you on this. I'm in a 100% agreeance and so. Not to bring it back to the golden arches at McDonald's, which I love so much. If I don't get a tight 10, let's say it's just like eight or below. Then in order to get back to that peppy self, then I gotta supplement those.

Lost two hours. Yeah. With a Coke and a sausage egg McMuffin. That seems to make most people happy. Yeah. I mean B, B, B. So in the spirit of our podcast being small towns, you grew up in Grass Creek. Yeah. And you're double wide. Yes. I'm assuming you were on. I bale of hay to sleep next night. It, it was like a, it was like a feather bed.

Yeah. Grandma's feather bed. Grandma's feather bed. No, it was nine feet high, six feet wide. Soft as a downy chick whole. Yeah. Like a, took a whole bolt of cloth for the tick. Ooh. You got into the second verse. I think nobody learns more than the first couple of lines. Yeah. Didn't get a lot of sleep, but had fun Grandma by the bed.

Yeah. Did you, uh, just a regular old single bed for Jason and the kiddies to be born? Uh, yes. Yes. Fair question. Actually, I was a, uh, bunk bed guy. Ooh. Yeah. 'cause I had to share a room with my older brother. Top you, top bunk. Uh, we, a lot of times we would rotate, you know, we'd have to shake it up a little bit.

And, oh, you can rotate. Like, can you and Heather rotate sides of the bed right now? Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's, you don't mess with that. That's a hard No. Growing up, yeah, sometimes I'd be on the bottom bunk. Sometimes we'd be on the top bunk and on a side note with that, it would never fail. I've talked about this before.

I love my older brother, he's a great older brother, but without fail, if I was on the bottom bunk, Wade would say we'd be drifting off peaceful slumber, and he'd say, Hey, Jason. I got a button up here and if you don't like, do everything I say, I'm gonna push this button and I can like squash you. And I'm like, yeah, whatever.

I'm gonna be on the top bunk, you know, next week. And then without fail, he'd build, Hey Jason, uh, if you don't do whatever, I say, I got a bottom a button down here. I can push it and I can squishy right into the ceiling. Oh man, this is real. This is like a bully report. Yeah. I might need to have a talk with this weight.

Exactly. But to get back to, it was a bunk bed with just a nice piece of foam. So no mattress. Oh, no, no. It wasn't needed. When you're a child. Yeah. Just fall down somewhere and go sleep. Yeah, I could sleep on the floor. Well, that makes me feel like a king. Do you? Do you realize I grew up in a waterbed. Oh, whoa.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Waterbeds were definitely a thing of the eighties. And into the nineties. I don't know if people are still buying 'em in the nineties, but I still had one and, uh, I don't know if I could get out of a waterbed to this day. No, there's no way. I don't have the core strength with this dad bo No.

To get out of a waterbed Yeah. And not fall. No. Yeah, that watered. But it was awesome. You had to pull a hose in for sure. But like at what age? I mean like, were you born in a waterbed or, well, I think I was born in the hospital, but, uh, no. It seems like my younger sister had the waterbed and for whatever reason didn't care for it.

Next thing you know, I had the waterbed. So for most of my years I think I had a waterbed. I mean, I ended up with waterbed, but I'll get that in just a minute. But was your, the type of waterbed where it was like literally just a huge balloon? Mm-hmm. In the frame. Yeah. So it wasn't like a, a watered that had some No firmness to it.

It was a watered that, like you, you heard a sloshing get Oh, sloshing around. Yeah. Which again, if you're in it now, as a grown man, I don't know how you get outta that. I, not a chance. You're gonna just, you'll get a tight 10 hours. Oh. Because you just can't get out. Well wake up in the morning. Well, guess I gotta stay here.

There's no getting outta this thing. You're like, Hey, as Suzy, uh, could you just bring him about three squares in here? Yeah. It's a younger man's game. A waterbed. Oh yeah. Do they, do they still make waterbeds? Um, that's a fair question. I don't know if they do. We had to, we had to do some. Maybe a little bit of Google research on that?

No. Well, Susie and I are now in a queen-sized bed. Okay. And you guys give me a little bit of grief for that. Yeah. Okay. We've talked about that. I don't know how you do it. Well, I don't know either. We are in a, 'cause every time I go on a little overnight somewhere and I'm in a king-sized bed, I'm like, this thing is enormous.

Kind of is. Yeah. But, um, I like to try to tell myself that the queen's okay. But then the dog comes in and I am a teetering yes. On the edge of that thing. Yeah. Susie's just spread eagle and the dog is, Perpendicular. Yes. We're like forming the shape of an H. Yes. And the kids too. Back when they were little, they'd come and climb in and yeah.

And why is it when the kids go perpendicular, their little feet are right in the wrong spots. You get, I've never been kicked in areas you don't wanna be kicked in more than when you have children. And I don't understand that. I'm like, why? It's like sleeping with like a boa constrictor or something. Yeah, it's just like a blow snake.

It's like get in your own rooms. I, and that's why buddy. Not only do you need to do a king bed, Heather and I, a few years back, we upgraded to a king bed, but we did a cow king bed. Oh boy. So it's a little bit longer. I mean, I'm a tall guy. Yeah. A little bit longer. But we took it a step further. I mean, I don't wanna go all Ricky Ricardo on you here, but, uh, we did, uh, we did Cow king.

They're basically separate beds, but with the, uh, rant, rant, rant. Oh yeah. So like you could go up and down. Yes. Like, raise the foot, raise the head. I need that. Well, yeah, you do. I mean, how do you eat in your bed without having that? That's true. I'm never comfortable and I'm gonna eat in my bed. Of course you are.

I mean, if you eat a Cheeto in the tub, that's, it's true. You're gonna, the Cheetos will be in the bed. Absolutely. And so it's kind of nice to have that. Are you a good sleeper? Do you sleep well? Um, not anymore. I don't either. Not anymore. I don't know what it is. It could be just my horribly guilty conscience.

I actually would love to go back. I would like to sleep in a waterbed again. I don't, I feel like there should be like one of those hotels with a theme room waterbed. Like a waterbed. Even though I started with a bunk bed, I'm gonna say, uh, maybe, uh, when I was a freshman in high school, you know, 14 years old mm-hmm.

I, uh, was on a quest again, this was in the early nineties. I wanted a waterbed. Well, they were the cool thing. They were the cool thing to do. And guess what? I found one. Ooh. Well, you, you don't just find a waterbed. Guess where I found it? The cesspool garage sale. Somebody else's. Yeah. Disgusting waterbed.

Who cares though, buddy? 'cause it's just a big, well, you're four, well you're 14, you don't care bed anything. You're 14 and it's just a big, we talked about this. It's just a big balloon. Yeah. I mean, you can, you basically dip that thing in Clorox, which I didn't, but I mean, you could have Yeah. Sprayer down.

It was a super single. Super single water bed. What's a super single like? Super, like just long, you know? Oh, like a long waterbed. Now this, of course, when you buy a waterbed at the garage cell, it comes with a few quirks, if you will, mainly no heater. So there was no heater underneath it to heat the water.

So you fill that sucker up with a hose, super cold ice cube, you know what I mean? But they didn't phase me. I would just put like, Seven or eight quilts. Yeah, down on it. Of course, you had to buy special sheets with waterbeds, if you remember. That would kind of tuck under so they wouldn't, now they say it, the corners wouldn't come up.

We had to, I mean, my parents love him so much because my dad, bless his heart, when I told 'em I wanted a waterbed, he was on board. I paid $50 for that waterbed. 50. That's dollars. Steal. Well, was a steel, but more than that. Again, to reference the double wide, he had to, we had to crawl underneath the double wide.

And like shore up the double wide. That's what I was gonna ask you. Yeah. I don't know how your double wide handles the weight of all that water. It wouldn't have, we had to shore it up underneath. What do you shore it up with? Cinder blocks, huh? Yeah, I guess that's makes sense. It's like a foundation within the foundation.

Yeah. That makes sense. But I love that waterbed. But you're exactly right. You kind of get going on that sucker. Yeah. It's like a ride. You can't get seasick. But you nowadays, you're not sleeping as well. No. Didn't you just do one of those tests where they hook you up with all sorts of electrodes? Oh my goodness.

I had like electrodes, like from what did what, what did they deduce? Uh, sleep apnea. Oh no. Like 70 some odd apnea in an hour. So you're dying 70 times within an hour? Every hour. Like I stopped breathing 70 times every hour. Well, you look great. Thank you. I feel great. Yeah. Well, I, I don't know if that's, you are wearing the Darth Vader mask and that.

I, I try to, but that's a problem. I can't keep it on, I don't do it on purpose, but I wake up every morning foot of the bed. It's like my brother-in-law, he wakes up with his shirt off all the time. He doesn't know how it comes off, but he comes off you like, I can't be responsible for this. I can't do this anymore.

Yeah. Apparently the other night, Heather said, I just like, she thought I was in a deep, peaceful slumber. Yeah. And I just shot bolt ride up out of bed, ripped that sucker off. You're a deep sleeper then? Not recently. I mean, it's just not great. You just snore? Uh, not anymore. Not anymore. I'd like to say I don't snore.

I have actually. Woken up. I know. We, we, we gotta figure that out. I was awoken by. I was, I was. Or is it awakened? Anyways, we've got English teachers all around us in our eyes. Well, my mother-in-law, mother-in-law, both of our mother-in-laws. We can figure that out. Yeah. But for now, let's just use the way words we wanna use.

I was woken up by my own snore one time, like startled me away and I said, oh man. And then I just, Went back to sleep. I'm a very light sleeper. Oh, you are Very light sleeper. I claim that my eyelids are made of paper machee, but I like to say, I like to say papier mache. Pappi. It spelled spelled p a p i E R.

Papier. Are you sure? Mach? Yeah. Tap it into your phone. It'll, it'll spell. Check it. Pape. And then it's m a c h e with a little apostrophe over top of the e. Happy. A happy a mache. Well, actually it should be pronounced that way then. I think so. So my eyelids are pap mache. Close your eyes. See that? Oh, I can actually see your eyeballs.

Yeah. They're luminous. Yeah. And so I, so I lay in my bed and any movement, any sounds, I'm hearing it, man. And, and so I just, everything I hear and perceive as. Maybe I need one of those like celebrity masks that people wear on to sleep at night. I guess it's a good thing as a father, you wanna be able to hear stuff.

You know, if maybe there's a burglar, I have to go and beat 'em up with my bare hands. Yeah. Some of that stuff I just didn't sleep through. Yeah, you're like nudging Heather. Hey, hey, there's a burglar. Could you go take care of that? Do you hear that? He, I don't, but do you just get lower in the sheets? Yeah.

Hopefully they don't take both of the kids. Just take one. Exactly. That sounds scary. That's why we had two. Yeah, they can have one. You know, you hear things. But sometimes you don't want to hear. Yeah, that's true. Well, sometimes you do. Have you ever had, have you ever been awoken by the gentle heaves of a child ready to throw up from their own room?

Oh, it's the worst. You know what's coming. Yeah. And all of a sudden you hear it's the cough that comes first. You know, it's the, oh no, they're gonna puke and then you hurry and wake your wife up. So she'll run in and take care of it. Yes. Yes. That's the worst. I mean, is it that, or is it the dog? But I swear there's a movie that.

Like it was inspired by that sound Princess bride. Well, the princess bride in the fire swamps. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. In the fire swamps. You remember like that cough that those little that kids do before they actually throw up is a lot like the fire swamp, where the fire would pop a few times before lighting.

Before lighting, so you have that chance to go in morning. It's the same with the dog when they start to hea, you know, you can hurry and get that dog outside before it actually throws up. The kids in the room. I remember specifically always down the hall from us, and I hear this, I'm like, oh no. So I run in there and it's already, oh no.

I mean the technicolor yawn that just launched and it's, it's not good. Next thing you know, you're at the grocery store buying one of those rug cleaner things. Oh yeah. Middle of the night. It's just, we've been known to throw comforters away, like, oh, for sure we're out on the lawn. We'll spray 'em down later.

Yeah. And, and you're buying like every baking soda by the case Yeah. To like sprinkle that stuff all over the carpet? Yeah. Well you gotta get the Sam's Club box. Oh. Just everywhere. Nothing worse than being woke to that. At least I heard it and I could get in there. Nothing will wake you up quicker. No. Run.

I mean, I don't care. Like I say, I'm a deep sleeper. It, it doesn't matter that that is like, This parent sixth sense, if you will, that you hear that? Mm-hmm. And you're just like, boom. Up, like, I'm up, like my head's on a swivel and I'm ready to go and, and you gotta run and you gotta be ready, but oh, well you gotta have a bucket of sawdust, you know?

Yeah. You remember in the elementary school that, that, that there was somebody who was always throwing up? Yeah, that's true. I remember a kid throwing up after recess and they had coleslaw for lunch. Oh, sick. I know. I don't wanna make our podcast gross. Yeah. It was coleslaw with raisins in it. Oh, and I, it's imprinted in my brain right now.

I know you can't eat that. No. Well, not then. That's just first of all, two things. Cole saw, uh, raisins. Why would they put that in there? Like two negatives, a positive? No, no, but the custodians always had sawdust. That's apparently what you put on, throw up. You put sawdust on it. But I don't know where a guy gets a bucket of sawdust.

Probably like down at the local, uh, dance hall. You know, throw a little sawdust on the floor. Maybe. I was thinking maybe you, you like to cut your Christmas tree down, don't you? Oh, yeah. I should start save the saw. Will you just save the do sawdust for me? I'll save it for you. It seems to make the most sense.

Make make a note. Make a note of that and see if you can see. You might have to cut the tree a lot of time. That's enough. I need a bucket. Yeah, you just never know when you're gonna need sawdust to be sprinkling on top of stuff. Well, and, and the sometimes the problem, I don't know about your kids, but um, of course that's gonna happen.

I mean, every kid's gonna throw up, but like, why is it when they throw up, like why don't they just simply either turn their head and throw up in one spot, or maybe even just get one blanket and just kind of throw up? Yeah. They're nothing thinking. No, no, they're not thinking. And I actually feel a little bit bad about that because, I mean, as was a grownup, this was just a few years ago, I was super sick.

On the couch, and I was feeling like I was gonna throw up. I'm a grown man, dude. You're a grown man. You should be able to make it to the bathroom. Make it to the bathroom. I attempted to make it to the bathroom, but instead of just, this was all in nanoseconds, I should have just turned my head and just threw up on the floor in one solitary spot.

But no, I clamped my hand over my mouth. And then ran to after that just creates a sprinkler effect. Yeah. I was just, it was just like a rain bird, you know? I mean, I mean I had it going north, south, east, and west all the way to that. Oh, that's no good. Yeah, I mean, there wasn't enough sawdust in the world.

You would need to go to an actual mill for enough sawdust for that. Exactly. We live in Millville. You think we'd have plenty access to, no, not enough sawdust around, I think not enough. I, one last thing though before, I don't know, I don't want to jump off track here, but, um, I am a deep sleeper. One time when I was a little guy, Sleeping on the top bunk this time, which is maybe why I got these fear of top bunks these days.

Hot summer night, of course we pulled the screen out of our window because it just made easy access to get in and out of the house that way. Mom know about that? Well, I mean, I think eventually she probably knew about that. Were you sneaking out or, well, I mean, I mean, not that's just your extra door to come into your room.

It's just your extra door to get in and out. I mean, because I was just a little guy and I was like three and a half miles from anything, so there wasn't enough. Where were you gonna go? Yeah. Nothing nefarious going on, you know what I mean? But I think probably what the big kicker was, brother, and I'm not making this up, just drifting off to a nice peaceful slumber again.

I'm on, I'm on the top, bunk window is open and I sense a little movement. Right over top of my head and, uh, a bat buddy. A bat What? Yeah, a bat. Like, like I, I'm pretty sure probably a vampire bat. I'm pretty sure. Yeah. I flew right in the window. Latched onto your neck? No. Oh. I mean, probably looking for a neck, but like, I was kind of tucked in tight.

Flew right into the bathroom. What do you do about that? You don't catch a bat with a Kleenex? No. No. I mean, so, you know, just call from mom and dad and that's what you do. Dad, dad, dad. Dad. There's a, there's a bat in the bathroom. There's a vampire bat, and he might've turned into Dracula already in the bathroom.

You got that? Got a visitor from Transylvania? Yeah, he got 'em though. He got him. Oh, that's, that's why you leave the screens on. I had two companions. That would pass gas in their sleep and wake me up. Wake up by, are you gonna get to this? Just to the noise? Just to the noise. I don't know what's worse though.

I, well, neither is great. Neither is great. But the one guy would bomb one. Yeah. And then he'd go, Ugh, that's in his sleep. So I had a. Arsenal of socks by my bed that I would just start peppering him in the middle of the night. You kinda like wa 'em up into a ball and just go, yeah, come on, man. Yeah. I had another guy that he could control the pitch of his flatulence.

Really? Yeah. I mean, pretty impressive. Yeah. I mean, it's not something you'd walk around and say, Hey, guess what I can do? Yeah. He's like, but he was a maestro of flatulence. He's like, you want to hear this in like a. C C sharp. It, it was probably more of a sharp than a flat. Yeah. Everything was sharp. I'm sure.

So let me see if I can reenact this. Okay. Um, this is, this is what I would hear in the middle of the night. You ready? Yeah. Go me, me, me, me, me. Yeah. Find the, no, I gotta find it. Here comes. Okay. Lemme try again.

I am telling you he could do that. That's impressive. Right. That is. Listen, that's impressive. I can't, I mean, that is having command, command of your gas. Yeah. But to be able to really take it from one octave, almost to a second octave. Yeah. And, and up just like that. To this day, I've talked to him. I'm like, that is really amazing.

Can you still do it? Oh yeah. Yeah, like I said, there's talent and then there's next level talent, next level, and he's a maestro of flatulence. Well, listen, I mean, everybody's got a gift. I don't have that gift, but I suggest you take those gifts and you hide those ones over a bushel, under a bushel basket.

Yeah. You put that under something. Hide that. No, I don't know. In the right company. I think it's a good party. Uh, what do they call it? A party. I'm not. Hmm. Party gift. I don't party favor? Party favor. Oh no. You don't wanna take that home with you and now you really don't. Um, but I don't know. So when you said like sometimes you would be awoken up Yeah.

It would wake you right up in the middle of the night and now I can see it waking you up. But would it wake up the perpetrator? I don't think so. I mean, I'd hope not because like no's sleeping right through that. Yeah. You'd sleep right there. It'd be scary you if you'd wake up. That's sick though. Did you, do you talk in your sleep?

Yeah, I, I actually talk, but even more than, Talk. I walk in my sleep. Oh, you're a sleepwalker. I'm a sleepwalker. That's scary. It is scary. 'cause I've actually been known to like, uh, go outside. Slipped on the ice one time, brother. Really? Yeah. And um, I had no idea You were a sleepwalker. A sleepwalker? Yeah. I was at my uncle's house one time, walked right out the front door.

I'm assuming in your underpants in Yeah. 'cause I was in your under roof in MOUs, in Mundus and, uh, winter. The only reason that I even remember any of this is because I slipped on the ice. It woke you up? It woke me up partially. There's two telltale signs. I, uh, apparently I am deducing the first part of the story.

Mm-hmm. Because I must have awoken mm-hmm. From a deep, full slumber. Mm-hmm. Deep, full, peaceful. Sure. I don't care. Thank you. Yeah, no problem. Uh, slumber walked out the front door, I'm assuming, walked out around the south of his house and that's where I encountered the patch of ice. Completely just biffed it, it caused me to.

Wake up a little bit. Now, interestingly enough, I remember that I was having some sort of a dream that I was very, very cold. Mm. Looking for a place warm to sleep. And in my mind he had some sort of bunkhouse or something that was gonna be much warmer than where I was, which I can't figure why that would be the case, but hey, we're dreaming here, you know?

Yeah. And uh, so I was looking, I walked all the way around his house, um, which was slightly outta construction, you know, he was doing an addition, so there's some construction going on. Came back in the same door that I left again. I was. Somewhat awoken at this point. Went back into bed when I woke up the next morning a little bit sore, and then I had like dirt and stuff on my feet.

Yeah. In the sheets. So, and then another time I was at my grandmother's house again. I probably should stop sleeping in my Underoos if I'm gonna be out. Yeah, you might wanna maybe put on a shirt and tie or something. Well, it seems a bit much, but, but, uh, I was, I was at my grandmother's house. My aunt was living there at the time as well.

She's hearing some commotion out of her window. She just parts the curtain. It's in the summer. I'm just out there emptying five gallon buckets that apparently were full of water. Huh. You would've thought she would've, you know, maybe. But she just went back to bed. Getting your chores done. Getting my chores done.

Yeah. You know how people tell stories and it kind of triggers a memory that I had a dream just last night that I had washboard abs. Oh really? Yeah. Yeah. But again, back, I'm glad. I don't, I'm glad, I mean, 'cause as we know, 75%, 75% prefer a dad bot according to the internet, which I'm sure is true. That's true.

And, and, and, and washboard abs do not go with a dad bot. No. That's gross. It's sick. It's sick. My kids will talk in their sleep a little bit. Okay. Like down the hall. I heard Ollie say almonds, cinnamon, roasted almonds, right back to sleep. I don't even know. Yeah. And then Stratford one time apparently yelled.

No mom, I don't wanna go to fat camp.

He also, Maya told me, he also said one time, dang it, you just ticked off the ostrich. What kind of dream, I dunno, is a guy having, when you're bothered that somebody upset an ostrich. Listen, listen, listen folks, I'm here to tell you, if you got a sleep store, we'd love to hear it. How can people give us information?

Is it just on the, uh, we got an Instagram. Set up. Yeah, for sure. So maybe leave a comment, we'll leave a comment on the Instagram. Um, if you're enjoying the podcast, give us five stars. But guys, somebody left us two stars. Two stars. I, I don't think I could take that kind of rejection. I can't either. So obviously I think they, they made a mistake.

Can you fix those? It's the only reasonable if, if that was you, I'm gonna need you to go back and fix it. Exactly. 'cause I can't sleep at night, obviously because of that. Because of that. And obviously just, I'm assuming it was a, a, a very understandable mistake. So five is what we're looking for. Yeah. And if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

It's thing at all. I mean, we're two good guys. Trying to bring you some joy in your life. They were probably thinking that, Hey, Dave and Jason, they're number one. Yeah. And then so they thought, let's put it as one. No, we're gonna need the five. Exactly. We're gonna need the five. Yeah. Because we can't take that kind of rejection.

Thanks again, folks, for listening to another episode of The Small Towns Podcast. We're pretty sure we've changed your life for the better. If not, well, we'll try again next time.